The "red" hand!!!

I went to the washroom, and, had a quick brush, to hush up things.














As I entered my room, mom finally spoke!













"Why are you smelling of smoke?" her eyebrows, had formed a definite curved, quite of habit.










"The guy next to me, was smoking badly! These guys you know, they are pathetic!!







I lied, smartly, and blatantly.





















As I advanced, my mom caught me by the arm, in a flash and seized my fingers, for a "sniff-test"!!!




















"So? Were you holding the cigarette for the guy???"








To be continued.....

Safe smoking!!!

By the time I was fifteen, I was definitely, a "luxurious" smoker, if not a "regular"!









And, expectedly, kept the chapter, away from the sensitive nostrils of mom!!















Only till one day, when I simply overdid things!
















I had smoked off three, full  length cigarettes in an hour's time.











 I headed back  home.







And, I was more than confident, I would simply, smartly, escape mom.










As I entered, mom stared at me, for an extra second, but, didn't say a thing.












My "safety" was ensured!









To be continued.....

Wedding plans and cigarettes!!!

The atmosphere at our place, was, gravely serious.








Mom and dad had put up ads on matrimonial sites, for Diya!!!









Somebody had taken Rima's wedding more seriously, than, she did!!








Long sessions went on, with the family astrologer, both, over phone, and, at his chamber!! I simply laughed madly, to myself, and then, felt sheepish!!






I got to be "serious"!!!












I was usually smart.






The only problem was that, sometimes, I overdid it, and, ended up messy!!











I had grown up, watching dad, smoke, consciously away from the farthest reaches of mom!! As a kid, I had always thought, smoking was much of chivalry, and elegance!










And, I tried it out, at twelve!! Ended up with a bad cough, and decided, to drop plans, but, only for the week!!!

To be continued.....

A random episode!!!

Paritosh's open exhibition of disliking, about our "business" procedures, had expectedly, fallen to deaf ears!!














And, he simply couldn't fake being cool! (Anyways, he wasn't!!!)










Palash, expectedly, came to the scene.











And, the first thing he did was, try, and scare the shit, out of us!







Tell me something!!















Who will get "shit scared" of a five-feet-two inch guy, thinner than the palest, underfed guy, in the entire housing complex!!!???!!!









We were least bothered, anyways!!!






To be continued.....

A marriage, finally!!!

Rima, my cousin was getting married in six months.












Rahul was a Malayali, Brahmin, vegetarian.









Rima, a Bengali, Brahmin, and a strict non-vegetarian!!










No wonder, mom and aunt were more than worried!!










"What will you eat?" was my mom's first question, when Rima had come down, with the news!









 "You'll have to eat lettuce leaves and fried cabbages!!!"











Mom was clearly, deeply concerned!












Bengali's are so badly obsessed with food, that, differences in choice of food could lead to divorces and murders!!

To be continued.....

Things gone worse???

I was behind the bars!!!
















To be frank, it was a strange, feeling!










I was confused about the way I was expected to feel!!











Feel good for the "manliness" of the act, or, feel bad, about the shit, I had got myself, in!









The other guy arrested along with me, already pleading, with badly leaking eyes!











Three hours later, I walked out!!













"Thank God, you weren't carrying it!" was Sanjay's instantaneous reaction!





My fear had paid off!










Cheers!!!!

To be continued.....

Wrong turn!!!

I was sipping tea and enjoying a smoke, when, suddenly, I noticed Sanket dragging "the guy", off his cycle, as soon as he had appeared in the horizon!






Nobody had the  faintest idea of the shit, invited!!









Two cops were on a casual stroll, on their bike, and they took no time in smelling the meat!!!









The leaner of the two, held Sanket, by the collar, and called for the cop van!!







This was real bad, and I was starting to realise that, when Sanket pulled out, yet another surprise!











He jerked off the leaner cop, dodged past the overfed one, and sprinted past my nose!









Suddenly, the cops, two of them, stood, on either side of me, coincidentally! What followed, was damn intentional!








Their eyes fell on me!









"Was he one of them?"









The beaten up guy, or the victim, as you would say, came to the play!!






To be continued.....

Of frights and fights!!!

I ended up, at the expected venue, with the excepted motive of beating up the guy!





And, I was luggage-free!







99.9% because, I was "dead" scared, and 0.1% because, it  pricked down secretive areas!!








We were a group of seven guys, waiting, to get the hell, out of one guy!! And, the guy, finally arrived!







Sanket, from my complex had come along as well! And, he was, incidentally, a cousin, of the guy, beaten up the last day!







It wasn't long before the guy, quite surprisingly, found himself pelted, with, slops, punches, and kicks, and soon, he was bleeding from the nose, teeth and was sporting a swollen, bruised eye!!








Teachers of the school came to the act, and we had to let go of him, even if, for the time being!







We waited for the guy to turn up; at a stone's throw, from the school premises!






To be continued.....

Serious business!!!

Days back, there had been a "serious" development in "business" affairs.





Paritosh had openly expressed his disliking to our "meddling" and " fingering" in his "bread and butter"!!






Without second thoughts, we were, at a place, doing something, on second thoughts, that would have seriously scared the shit out of me!!



The "transaction" went successfully.








Hours Later.










My business partner Sanjay, and I, were sitting, sipping whiskey over "serious" things! I was literally staring, yet not over the fact, that I was owning something "shittily scary"!!





A one-shutter pistol would expectedly get anybody's heart on his sleeve! I was having it in my fist, trying hard to reduce the number of unnecessary beats per minute!!!








I was expected to carry this luggage, along, every minute I was awake, with me, and rest it, beneath my pillow, when asleep!!!








Things had, all of a sudden, turned shitty serious!





To be continued.....

Tidbits!!!

Paritosh Saha was too lean to be a land mafia!






He stood about sixty one-and-a-half inches, and to the maximum, weighed forty seven kilos and two hundred seventy five grams!!!






He looked more of a half-starved struggling actor in the Calcutta film industry!!



 His bike looked paler than my rusted bicycle!









The other "head" of the gang, was, his elder brother, Palash, who stood half an inch "taller",
and weighed fifty two grams "heavier"!!






He had divorced his wife, because, their child resembled his driver, badly enough, to be false!!!





I don't know how he managed to get about one-and-a-half dozen murder cases, to his name! Can you bribe for that??








Being into real estate business, I proudly felt, "wanted", and a micro mafia!!!









Half of the people around, were scared of my "ill" temper, and the rest, of the "rumoured facts" of real estate business!! And obviously, I was pretty much enjoying the otherwise absolutely unnecessary attention!!! To an extent, that, I went to beat up a guy, who had bashed up one of the guys of our complex, leaving him bruised!!

To be continued.....

Of dreams, drama and disaster!!!

When I was fourteen, I had expressed my desire to earn a living, out of writing.









Mom declared me a lunatic, then and there.




Dad said, writing can be only a passion, not a profession!!







And then I came to know of one of the weirdest facts I have known, till date!!! Mom, was expectedly flooding the mosaic floors with her nuclear weapon. Tears!!










And then, she spoke!











"For the past fourteen years, me and your dad have dreamt of seeing you, as a doctor!! Your dad has shed every sweat of his forehead, on his feet, to earn every buck! You have been given the best schooling possible! We have sacrificed our luxuries, just to see a doctor of you! And now, you want to be a writer!!! We have seriously failed in your upbringing!"












"Mom, just one question. You dreamt of all this, for the  past fourteen years?? You mean, while I was busy sucking plastic nipples, and soiling diapers, you were dreaming, on my behalf???"








"We are your parents. We can! And, what we think, is actually, the best for you."







"Mom, I have my dreams!!"







"You're a terrorist!!! You'll always rebel, without a cause!! Immatured idiot."






She had literally drowned in her Pacific of tears, and even her eyes had given up, having fallen short of tear supply!!







 But, a terrorist??? I mean, I'm not even a Khan!!!

To be continued.....

The Calcutta rains!!!

Calcutta  rains are amazingly disgusting.









When you'll want them, they would be busy, inflating their ego, and, when you would just stop asking for, somebody, would just prick a safety pin to the ballooned ego!!









Calcutta skies cry worse than a girl!!!






Now, you know how shitty that is!!












And, for a city, enriched with ninety eight thousand seven hundred ninety five-and-a-half potholes, nothing could be worse!!








For a week, you'll experience a cheaper,  filthier and a more Bong Venice!!!







You'd curse the skies, and, just glance at the prospect of a possible side business of ferry services!!










But then, Bongs get over things really fast! To an extent, that, often, or rather mostly, they would have got over the reason, to speak, and yet blabber on! And, guess what! They do all of that, for free!!!






To be continued.....

Random shits!!!

Life is that stranger, who comes in one night, uninvited, bangs you hard, left and right, up and down, and leaves you, pregnant, and the lingering pain for the months to come!!







And those are usually the times, I seriously doubt the fact, that, men are not entitled to pregnancy!!






Or, may be.........









Fuck!!!




What am I trying to even imagine???









But yes, we were not the only contenders! There were other, scary, dangerous people, looking to earn fast bucks the way, we were doing!!








Land mafia!!!








Totally happening!!!





To be continued.....

The business!!!

The "business" I was into, demanded great "talent" and "promise"!!









I was expected to make pure ass-holes, out of people, without them, realising it!!











Like, I would just behead a "murga" (chicken), and before any realisation, it would be, in the kitchen!









Tricking conscience and guilty feelings, you see!!













But then, I was quite identical to the Indian Government!














The guilt shit didn't exist, by default!!!















And as far I was earning good bucks, nothing else mattered!












I have always followed the footsteps of the seniors, the country's lawmakers!!!







To be continued.....

Finally!!!

The greatest irony was, she was badly serious!!!











"Sujata, I'm just 22!!"












"I'm 24! And I need to get married soon!"













I knew, what I wanted to do! Run off!!!




Seriously.










I simply faked a call, and a conservation!







Minutes later, I was, free, from the clutches of a desperate "manly" lady!!!









Fuck man!! No more online dating!!!







Her calls didn't stop, though! She wanted an engagement, in a month! I used up, the only option, left!!









"Sujata, I think I'm liking your sister!!!"






To be continued.....

When things turned worse!!!

We ended up, in a mall, and for the first time, I owned the disgrace of actually taking a close look at her!!









Oh! Fuck!!!












She had a prominent moustache, and even crumbs of beard, which despite, being shaved , and buried, in kilos of make up, couldn't keep away, it's prominence!!!












The thought of making love to her was enough, to throw up!!











And, it was just the beginning!!!









Minutes, after she had unsettled my thoughts and hormones, that too, not in a positive way, she struck disaster, yet again!!









All of a sudden, she grabbed me by the hand, and inched closer!!












"Will you marry me?"







To be continued.....

The date disaster!!!

Obviously, like every other employed jobless, I was on Facebook.





And, it more than serves, a platform for online dating and beyond!






Now, I was dating this lady (girl sounds too innocent), who was a teacher. I was 22, she was 24.






 And, from her profile picture, she looked hazily decent!






I was hardly concerned about looks, anyways!! Mujhe bhi kaun sa shaadi karna tha!!!



Moreover, I was also sneaking a chance, at her cousin!! Sounds sick?? Who cares!!






We finally closed in a weekend for a date! I hardly knew of the shit, that awaited!!!






We met, well on time. And, the first thought, that crossed me, was, lose myself in the crowd!!!
Seriously!!







The only consolation was, her cousin had come along, too! At least, I had some reason to stay  back!!





To be continued...

Weird, wired!!!

I'll tell you something, we have a dramatically creative family!!!





I faced the strangest, and the weirdest of questions, and sitting back alone , I would actually, laugh out loud!!









Returning home, I would ring the bell, dad would come up, and ask the strangest question, "Oh, you've came??"


"No dad! I was just searching for a wi-fi, without a password, and I just found it here!!!"










We would have a marriage party to attend, and, quite expectedly, everybody would be late!!




I would loiter in a sherwani, when mom would come, adjusting the folds for her saree! Chancing upon me, she would ask so seriously, "Ready?"



"What? No!! I was just checking out, how good a clown I would look, on my wedding right!!!"








We would go to a relative's place, and she would have literally strangled me with excessively huge amounts of food, and then would ask the worst question, in the most innocent manner!



"Did you feed properly? Want some more?"


"Oh yes! You see the hump on my back? I'll store it there!!!"










The worst of all, I would wake up early, one morning, quite accidentally, and mom would be like, "Oh! You awake??"



"Who says so?? I was checking how I look, when I sleep!!!"








I could definitely run a circus, with my family!!!!





To be continued...

The usual pandemonium!!!

The usual routine for my parents was pretty much constricted and fixed!







Mom would wake up, and start screaming, and by the time, she would be done with making tea, we would anyways be awake! The peels of shriek and cry were badly "alarm"ing!!!  







Dad would have his tea, and get back to his all-important work of writing one more science article, before deadlines had to be extended!!!









I would wake up to a smoke, and a semi-cold tea, finish both, and again doze off!!! I had literally stop attending college classes, for, attendance would never be an issue!!







And, none of my so-called "business" clients would ever turn up before noon. (though some jobless, actually did!!)







Life was pretty good with easy bucks, what if I wasn't following my dreams?? Anyways, I wouldn't be!!!

To be continued...